www.simplesite.com/PaulTheRealist

have a look at my blog. just started so their is only 1 post but it is building. to read what i have written, it is in the top left of the screen!!!


NOT wanted

tonight was interesting. got ditched, nothing new there. Got put second best. again. but i sat in a park, wishing upon stars, hoping that something magical would happen. nothing happened!! but i actually sat their, tears running down my face. wanting the sky to drop and wanting my life to end. it didnt happen. is anyone really wanted or is everyone NOT wanted like i am? see happiness comes around very very often for me, but when it does happen the whole world will know about it. clearly the world is right in this case. i hate life, i hate everything!!!! music, basketball and a very selected few people is what keeps me going! but really its my life and my choices. I have to live with them but so do my family and very limited friends. the main reason i havent killed myself yet is because of my mum, she is my number one and i aint losing that. life is a bitch, i hate it and want it to end. but is anyone truly happy???


confused…

Some people would call me a cunt, others a dick! i refer to myself as a realist! i give people the wake up call that they deserve, i tell it how it is and im blunt about it. You cant get your emotions accross through lies and fucking hiding. The truth has to be told straight up otherwise they will second guess your statement!!! But lately i havent been doing anything along those lines, i havent lied but i just cant be fucked dealing with people who dont give two shits about me. Why respect someone who dosnt respect you back. I used to be so determined to find a girl, but after constant rumours, constant banter and being led on, i am throwing in the towel. The only thing that i care about is sport and fitness. Friends who needs them, they dont really care about you. Some will pretend to, just to save arguements. Others will just be their and not really pay attention to what you say. Being ignored is nothing anymore, i am used to it. Not one person has actually asked if i am alright in the past few days. I go out and i am just not myself, yeah cant tell something is up. Fucking pathetic by them but mostly me. I hate simpathy, its why i wear my fake smile every where i go. It saves being asked questions that i dont want to be asked. But when i dont have it on and no one asks, that just hurts!!! Life is a bitch but i can handle everything. Its when i get confused that i start to really struggle at life…


no more happiness…

Today the 21 of August 2012, is the day i stop giving a fuck about people who dont want my friendship. I am what people called a push over, i go out of my way to please people. No matter who they are, no matter what shit they have put me through, i would still do anything to put a smile to their face. But recently i have had a huge wake up call, and now i dont give a fuck about people. Friends are great, when you can trust them every second of every day. My list of people who i can trust has been narrowed down from hundreds to now only a handful of people. True mates, these are the friends that will hopefully get me through each day. I have made my mistakes, i have fucked up friendships but i make a mend for them. If they still mean the world to me i will do what ever it takes to actually get their friendship back, but i have heard “friends” making very harsh and malicious comments towards me. Not to my face but behind my back, thinking that i wouldnt actually find out. It amazes me that people can actually rat you out like that after all i did for them. My good nature is no more. I will show respect to people who actually deserve it. No more nice Paul, its time for Paul the realist to set people back in their fucking place. catch ya!


so would get this

so would get this



maxkuhntattoo:

Day two in Pittsburgh. Sitting on most of the photos of tattoos from this mini tour (Taken with Instagram at scratchxlife)

maxkuhntattoo:

Day two in Pittsburgh. Sitting on most of the photos of tattoos from this mini tour (Taken with Instagram at scratchxlife)

(via maxkuhntattoo-deactivated201210)


wwnorton:

Welcome to Two Guns, Arizona.

Just because we published The Road to Somewhere: An American Memoir, James Reeves’s book about traveling the backroads of America, doesn’t mean he has stopped searching and recording what he finds on his beautiful blog Big American Night.


strong?

alright so what is the definition of being strong? is it having huge muscles? is it having a strong mind set? or is being to cope with everything and not crack under the pressure? Im not physically strong but fuck i have some mental strength. well not recently. i have lost my mind and have turned to self harming. slicing my wrists and legs dosnt effect me, i thought the pain would be unbearable but its not. The pain i face each and every day, is a lot worse than it. It dosnt really make sense to me. how can making myself bleed and bruise feel better than bullying or hating life? i dont get a relief from self harming but i just dont know how to stop. I want to because my friends are worried. well i think they are! but its not a healthy thing to do. i have to hide the cuts from my parents and family but thats not the worrying thing. teachers are noticing these things. no the scars but my behavior in class and out in the yard. People. Its not good to self harm, i have learnt that. yes it sound fucking stupid but you cant decide till you have done it. thats not an invitation to go out and do it. But please try and stay away from it after suffering through a hard time. depression and anxiety have made me turn to it and i wish i hadnt. but just try hold onto your mental strength, cause once you lose that. it takes a while to get it back to full strength. so you might not have the biggest muscles, or have the power behind you. but you do have a strong mental mind even if you dont think you do. you do! so believe in yourself and go out and make a difference. 

peace!  


fuckyeahtattoos:

My tiger. The path we have walked will always be part of us. Thank you Amy Nicholls from Tattooed Heart Studios, Glen Burnie, MD

fuckyeahtattoos:

My tiger. The path we have walked will always be part of us. Thank you Amy Nicholls from Tattooed Heart Studios, Glen Burnie, MD